the turkey swiss on rye incident
OMG the exciting conclusion. I’ve always wondered how this ended.
Great. Now I have a totally new thing to worry about.
How even the what what
Uh, sir. Your house…
It’s just like, “I give up”
Bae: Come over
Me; I can’t.
Bae: I got the Winter Solider on DVD
I waitevSIX MONTHS TO MAKE THIS POST
Hands down, my favorite reoccurring joke.You forgot this one
My boyfriend (via thecarrionlibrarian)
#no but can you imagine if that was how you learned once a month you weren’t pregnant#by some dude singing songs about the victory of it#you wake up and he’s there and you are so happy#this dude becomes your favorite dude#but then you realize you haven’t seen your friend’s minstrel in a while#I mean everyone notices#like half the people are on the same cycle so for one week out of four your job is just flooded with fucking minstrels everywhere#the cacophony#but Mary over there is all alone#and she’s like my minstrel is late#but we all fucking know#her minstrel has gone off to find her a baby#a nine month journey he must make alone#and until he comes back there is no music in her life#what a glorious world this would be#I love the minstrels (@onionjuggler)
Something done right
It’ll never happen
Hollywood would rather burn.
I’ll get the matches